The Former Traveling Spotlight

The tales of a "30" something gay former stand-up comic living in NYC who is searching for his soul mate or soul...which ever comes first.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Benefits of Friends

As babies, we get (hopefully) all our needs met by our parents. Food, clothing, love, and nurturing are provided by a genetic contract that says "You got knocked up...so you get to deal with me for the next 18 years!"

But as adults, we suddenly are thrown into a world where we are the sole providers of our own needs. If you want to eat, you've got to work and earn money for food. If you want love, you've got to date and love in return. And of course...sex. It's a need and for some people (not mentioning names as I look in the mirror) it's a priority. So on the 69th day, God created the Fuck Buddy Relationship...and it was good. (I can hear the conservatives ready to slam me for that statement.)

Or is it? Do Fuck Buddy relationships, or the lesser term "Friends with Benefits" really work? Or does it eventually always lead to the downfall with one of the participants, as feelings eventually get involved?

Discussing this with my friend, he put an interesting spin on it. "FB relationships can work if both partners involved are getting emotional support elsewhere. Then it truly becomes strictly a physical gratification. Otherwise...there is a risk of getting hurt. There are rules, but what are they?

If two single people are having this kind of arrangement, do they have dinner or drinks beforehand? Or does it move into the "dating" realm. Can fuck buddies stay that way, or will it eventually move into some type of additional relationship? Is it destined to fail?

Which maybe brings up the bigger question. Is sex casual at all?

Patrick - 1:39 PM -

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