The Former Traveling Spotlight

The tales of a "30" something gay former stand-up comic living in NYC who is searching for his soul mate or soul...which ever comes first.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Finding the Upside

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

When riding on the subway, I find myself reading all the ads. I'm not interested in the ads, but rather it beats staring at the crazy lady who pees, listening to the homeless poet's newest poetry ("I'm broke and that ain't no joke."), buying a candy bar from some kid, or risking getting too close to the old man who wants to touch you while he's beating off with the other hand (yes...all of these things have happened in the last week to me).

This morning, the one that caught my eye was an ad that had only the phrase:

Finding the Upside.

Yes, inspirational words on the subway. Who would have thought? Yet, the funny thing is, there are times when I hear my single friends, or even myself questioning the logic. What if this is the bright side?

My married and partnered friends tell me that I and my fellow singles have it all. We can date anyone, fuck around if we want to (which apparently I must do often based on recent feedback I've been getting), or even just take a night for ourselves. The thing is, most of my single brethern all lament that it's a bitch to meet new people, especially in New York, the town of the stand offish. There are times while running that I can't get the person running towards me to make eye contact. I hear most singles complaining that we get too many of those "nights to ourselves". Yet at the same time, we're not usually willing to take the chance and talk to the stranger that has caught our eye. We fear rejection.

When does our need for emotional interaction and sex out pace our insecurity and fear of rejection? Just how emotionally starved do we need to be before we're willing to take the chance and ask the hottie on the subway for his name and number? How many pairs of jeans do we need to buy before we get the guts to ask out the salesperson? How many beers are necessary to take a chance?

As for me, I'm looking on the bright side. Cooking for one is cheap.

Patrick - 2:02 PM -

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